THE WEEKENDER by Clyde Black: Intense Pain and Screaming
You guys have lived my life with me for about 20 years now! The old Weekender has shared some hot political beliefs, intelligence info and personal tragedy for a long time. I think it’s safe to say that you know me! This article was always intended to be a little fun and give a little distraction to the sometimes hard realities of surviving day to day life. All my friends are distressed after having lost loved ones, children in trouble, parents reverting to childhood, business failures and dealing with friends and family with drug related issues. So here, have a laugh at my expense.
It’s not really funny but I need my sense of humor now as much as I ever did. I have been in INTENSE PAIN for about 7 weeks now! An old back injury has started exercising a new tactic and my left leg has felt like it’s on fire! It won’t go away. I can’t sit or lean. I eat standing at home, watched the World Series standing! I cry at work and I’m looking for a stand up commode. Eventually, this pain sent me to doctor in the Woodlands who had been recommended by some local friends. An MRI revealed that I have no discs from the mid back down. The nerve is just hitting bone!
We decided that of two options, a shot of steroids or surgery that I would try the shot first. The Doc said to show up wearing pants with an elastic waist band which I did. They proceeded to yank my britches down like a kid wearing his jeans to low, started rubbing stuff in the lower crack area where back meets down yonder, and stuck a needle, I’m sure it was a foot long, into my tailbone going from down yonder to up the spine. He twisted that needle around in there like a nurse trying to hit a vein for a blood test! I didn’t want to embarrass the Marine Corps so I took my cap off and hid it as I started screaming! I knew when it was really going to be bad because the nurse patted my shoulder.
Other than just venting and feeling sorry for myself, my message to my male brothers is go to the doctor before things get horrible. I don’t know why we hate to go to the doctor but we need to get over it. Yes, guys, they might intrude our bodies but please don’t wait to long! None of us want to face those prostate issues or colon issues but please take advice from the old Weekender and go check these things out and perhaps you can find a few more years to share with and care for your families. Semper Fi, and good health!