Home Columnist Gaming The System — the Texas way!

Gaming The System — the Texas way!

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There is more than one way to skin a cat. A Texas cowboy walked into a New York City bank and asked to borrow $5,000. The banker was not impressed — but did ask the Texan what he had for collateral. With that, the cowboy handed over the title to a new $250,000 Ferrari that was parked outside. The banker shook his head, and told the customer he would have to charge interest of 12 percent on the loan. With a handshake, the Texan told the banker that he was heading to Paris, France for a two week meeting. After the customer left, the banker had a good time telling other bank employees about the “crazy Texan” who pledged a $250,000 auto for a measly $5,000 loan. He then told an employee to park the auto in the bank garage.

Two weeks later, the cowboy strode in and told the banker he wanted to pay off his loan. The interest came to $23.07 for the two weeks — and the car was redeemed. Just being curious the banker asked the cowboy why he needed $5,000 when his credit report showed he owned a big ranch in Texas, with lots of cattle and oil wells. The cowboy answered, “’It’s just simple math. Where else in New York City could I park my expensive auto for two weeks for only $23.07 and know it will still be here when I return”?

School teachers are really upset. Their pay for their duties in the classroom shows little improvement. A new 22-year old teacher that goes to work for the state minimum of $28,080 must teach thirty years before being eligible for retirement. After thirty years of teaching, the state maximum salary is only $45,510 a year. Retirement income for that teacher comes to $30,355 annually. But the Texas Legislature, which determines what teachers are paid, has a much, much better retirement program. A Texas legislator who serves four terms (8 years) gets a pension at age 60. Or after serving six terms, or 12-years, the pension starts at age 50. And the dollars are huge. Those who serve for thirty years get a check for $105, 386 every year thereafter. No wonder so many folks want to run for office!

Making hay between rains gets to be a dicey issue. Getting the grass down, getting it cured and then baled takes three days — and lately our rains come more often than that.

horace@valornet.com